10 Comments
User's avatar
Lauren's avatar

I would like to add that there's usually a group of extreme outliers who go through this around the age of thirteen - or at least, the realisation starts forming around then.

Expand full comment
Fer's avatar

you defined me. I suspect you're one of 'us' too.

You really wouldn't recognize one if you were not.

Expand full comment
Tobi Amida's avatar

They are probably at a level higher to not only recognise it, but also articulate it with such deftness. This is practiced excellence

Expand full comment
Alexis Raejéan Walsyphrum's avatar

Welp, this certainly resonates.

✨️🫨✨️

Eloquently composed.

Thank you for sharing.

Expand full comment
André's avatar

Lauren, perhaps one of the defining characteristics of a functional psychopath as exposed in the text is non-presence, which is little recognized in a profound way by those who experience it.

I don't stop to reflect on this because it's fruitless. Even if I had someone I could talk to about it, it wouldn't change society. I think that's why I chose to be an advertising executive by profession and to study psychology and human behavior: by understanding others, I develop more empathy for them, so I don't end up cloistered in my castle of arrogance, as many people end up being. Intelligence and curiosity go hand in hand.

I hope that this series of articles that began with “Outlier Genius” continues and that you can delve deeper into the loneliness (and perhaps fear) of not finding an ideal partner without losing this essence that we have.

Expand full comment
Jonathan Awad's avatar

The way I was going to send this to you after reading it… then saw you wrote it!! You’re so GOOD, Lauren ;

Brilliant

Expand full comment
Edward Espinosa's avatar

Imagine understanding you can't have stimulating conversations with normal humans until you are 30+ at the age of 12-13. Who wouldn't want to end it all? Being disrespected and treated like an animal because of your race or gender. Others go through a similar shame, but they don't yet understand how much of a better person they are than the transgressor. Choosing to help others instead of creating the same harm should be respected if nothing else.

Expand full comment
Roy's avatar

Are you speaking from experience?

Expand full comment
Edward Espinosa's avatar

Unfortunately. Was handed a Bible at like 13ish and felt an uncomfortable feeling. I felt that there might be lies so I turned away from the church and leaned into eastern teachings until I became agnostic. Finally returned to the church at 39 after creating my personal version of worship.

Expand full comment
panos.babatsikos's avatar

dull the knife

I see through and through

Before you speak before you think

I see your soul my oldest trick my dearest friend

I read your aura, inhale your disposition

and just like that I mirror -all

your Yesterdays your Nows and your Beyonds

I keep at bay and don’t utter a (true) word

I talk and talk and I own the room

which room?

the lesser room the insignificant room

always counting, seeing, measuring

And I drink and I drink to dull the knife that cuts you all

and me the most.

Expand full comment